4 Things That I Focused on During Quarantine

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So, this year has been such a crazy year for us all, right? I mean what else can we expect to happen. This year may have had its downfalls, but I have learned some amazing things during this pandemic. So here I will share with you a few things I am thankful for going through to see that God always has a plan for you and me.

1. Learning to love yourself as God loves you.

For years, I discredited myself for many of my accomplishments. I hated myself for years because I never seemed to fit the narrative to other’s people’s stories of how I should be. I always tried fitting in. Doing the next cool thing. Purchasing all the nonessential things. Basically, living my life to please others and not God.

This past year brought me to my knee’s not once but multiple times. I had to start seeing myself as God sees me. And that includes all the imperfections I carry. I must remind myself that being different is a good thing. Following God’s word and having His spirit fill me instead of the world and it's expectations. I had to stop trying to love myself with empty pleasures. I had to start opening my eyes to who I truly am and not for what others want me to be.

I had to stop bashing my own self image because of what others tried to label me as. Bad friend. Ugly. Fat. Shameful. Selfish. Irresponsible. Stuck up. These are a just a few things I used to tell myself daily because I heard it so often. Self-sabotaging every step of the way because I no longer felt worthy of loving myself because of my own sins.

As I read more of my bible, I was able to face my fears of not being liked by others. I was able to shed away the hurt and shame I felt when I looked at myself in the mirror before me. I started saying to myself all the good things I am rather than the things I did not like. I started putting more effort into loving God and allowing His grace to shine over me. Because we are all His children, and we are beautifully and wonderfully made in His eyes.

Being able to shut out the enemy and letting the Holy Spirit speak to me has done wonders on my self-confidence. Yes, there are things I am still working on, but my physical body does not bring me happiness. It is more valuable to learn to love who you are through the eyes of our Lord than what we see in the mirror.

2. Your mental health should be a priority in your life.

After battling trauma, depression, and anxiety for many years, I had to take the necessary steps to get myself healed. Even if that meant me leaving things behind that no longer served a purpose for me anymore. I know society likes to put a stigma on mental health and it could be good or bad. But I have learned that every journey is different for everyone.

Most importantly, it is a journey that you must take with the highs and lows. Mental health should be treated as a priority. We live in a society that praises people pleasing and that is not how we should live our lives. People pleasing will only lead you down a road of depression because you are constantly putting other people’s needs before your own. I know it sounds harsh and selfish, but as a mother, wife, friend, and daughter, I have to keep myself in check or I may lose the battle of my own depression if I do nothing.

Mental health is important. Being able to get help when you need it is necessary. Don’t let others bash you or shame you into thinking asking for help is a weakness. It is far from it. Do what you need to do to keep your mind in a healthy state. Wellness is mind and body. Remember that.

3. Protect your energy.

So often we give ourselves freely among others. We distribute everything we have to make everybody else’s day, but we end up leaving ourselves on empty. Now as a mother, I know it’s a different ballpark. But this does not pertain to motherhood in a sense to our children. We live and breathe for our kids. My reasoning about protecting your energy is when you are surrounding yourself with toxic things or people.

Many times, we put ourselves around the very people who drain us from our positive energy and replaces it with a negative cloud hanging over us. Negative people will soak up all the good you have and not replenish you with anything but their burdens or problems.

As an empath, yes, I love being able to help my friends and to hear them out. I have learned that their problems may not be for me to solve personally, but to be of guidance to get them where they need to go. We must learn boundaries and say no more often. I do not feel it is anybody’s plan to suck the positivity out of me, but I have learned that it is okay for me to say no. To cancel plans. To stay home. To recoup when needed. My energy matters as well and if I am not emotionally available to speak or hang out, then I will not put myself in that position.

You must be mindful who and what you surround yourself with. How you feel around things.

4. Stop scrolling and open your bible more.

This one has been a huge struggle for me. I get so involved with social media that I forget to nourish my mind with God’s word. Most of the things that are shared on social media does nothing but leave me empty most of the time. I start comparing my life, my relationship, and my parenting skills because I do not fit the perfection category. Spoiler alert: I know nothing in life is ever perfect.

I have put a lot of time and energy just being nosey and looking at people’s lives and just dwelling on the things I do not have. I had to check myself many times and realize that God has done so many amazing things that is right in front of me. He has provided me with a loving spouse. Two beautiful girls. A beautiful home. Loving friends. And most importantly, becoming a newfound Christian again.

We get so caught up in what everyone else is doing we lose track on what we have in front of us. We lose sight on the things that matter the most. We start forgetting what we have and focus on what we do not. This way of thinking only leads us further away from our blessings.

I learned that I need to step away at times. Focus on reading my bible. Taking part in my devotionals. Going to church faithfully. Things that will help fill my cup rather than take away.

Living with God’s word in mind has opened my heart in so many ways I never seen before. I have been in a better place. Feeling more at peace. Finding my happiness again during my own chaos that goes on in life.

With God by our side, we can see life in a whole new way. We can share more hope through our solitude. Helping others see the light in their darkness. Instead of focusing on what others may share, focus on what you can do to put more light in this world. Do not add to the gloom.

Of course, there are many other things I could have listed here, but these are I felt the most important. We all go through seasons and this season has been such a roller coaster for me. It is hard when things start to change. We sometimes hinder ourselves and stay stuck in a vicious cycle.

As your friend, I am here to tell you that you are never stuck in your own ways. You have the opportunity to walk with freedom wherever you may be in your own journey.

There is peace in this world. Especially peace within yourself. Sometimes we must take a step back, evaluate what we are doing right and what we are doing wrong and go from there.

It is never an easy task to accomplish and we get discouraged from time to time. But allow God to speak to you. Allow Him to be a part of your life, and I promise you that you will start to see the light once again. All in God’s timing.

I will leave you with this verse:

“Our Lord Jesus Christ and God our Father loved us. By his grace God gave us comfort that will last forever. The hope he gave us is good.” 2 Thessalonians 2:16